Femininity

Femininity

Femininity is power.

But some have twisted it to oppress women. When I say some, I mean most of society in almost every culture on the planet. 

That’s how powerful it is. That if we’re not careful with it, if we don’t know how to use it, it can be used as a weapon against us. 

Allah (SWT) created both masculine and feminine energies. These are in perfect harmony with each other, a balance that allows us to thrive. But there is more profit in imbalance. 

There’s more money in divorce, in the rat race to have the most and look the best, in seeking out solutions to “fix” us when we finally realize something is wrong. 

We are being taught that our true purpose is lying outside of ourselves and our deen. We are being taught to accept our flaws without being shown how to transform them into strengths. We are being taught to fight our nature so that we are constantly questioning who we are and what we’re supposed to do. 

And all of this has created a world full of unhappy, unfulfilled people. Things that were once beautiful are now seen as ugly and a burden. Things have fallen drastically out of balance. So how do we return back to that harmony?

We can only start with ourselves, one action at a time. As women, we must embrace our femininity and use it for good. The traits that we’ve tried to distance ourselves from because the world has told us they would never allow us to be successful-these are the traits we need to take back. These traits are unique to us, they give us our power! They have been bestowed upon us by Allah (SWT) as a gift to make this world a better place. 

Femininity= gentle, patient, nurturing, empathetic, beautiful, creative, supportive, detailed, healing, calm, compassionate, collaborative, receptive, intuitive, uniting…

In Islam, the feminine is treasured so much so that it is veiled from everyone except those worthy of being graced by it. Women are given rights, encouraged towards education and contribution, their natural role as daughters/sisters/wives/mothers given the recognition and status it deserves. 

“The women are not a garment you wear and undress however you like. They are honoured and have their rights.” – Umar ibn Al-Khattab R.A.

There is so much about being feminine that I want to revisit and relearn. I want to start here. See where it takes me.

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ramadan, Uncategorized

Ramadan and Your Menstrual Cycle

Y’all know it’s going to happen to a majority of us at some point during the month, so what do we do?

I used to get quite frustrated with my period during Ramadan. I saw it as a great injustice that I had to miss out on a week of fasting and good deeds just because my body decided to punish me for not getting pregnant. But the truth is, while you do have to put off fasting, you don’t have to put off your good deeds. Reading Quran may be off limits, but there is so much more that you can do to grow in your deen and serve the ones around you.

Mufti Menk once said something along the lines of this: what a blessing it is that Allah (SWT) chose to make things easy for women during their periods, subhan’Allah. It isn’t a curse and it isn’t something we should complain about. We get to rest and let our bodies do their thing. The female body is such a beautiful creation that requires a lot of care and that’s not a bad thing. She goes through seasons of fertility, rejuvenation, creation, intimacy, passion, energy, and nurturing. She is dynamic and transformative, subhan’Allah. The few days to a week that many of us have to slow down are crucial to reflecting and taking time to focus on things we usually move to the side.

All of the things we can do:

Make dua and do zhikr. Catch up on reading books on Islamic values and journaling your thoughts, feelings, and desires. Take the time we would usually be praying our 5 daily prayers and taraweh to reflect/meditate on whatever we feel needs attention. Volunteer and/or give to charity. Visit older family members, cook for people, or teach children about Islam. Slow down during this week (if we can) and practice a little self-care. Show a little love to ourselves and show love to our family. Especially now that everyone is fasting and low on energy, maybe we can help make everyone’s day a little better (which is also a form of charity, btw).

Obviously, we have to eat and drink during the day while we are menstruating. But it is also kind of awkward when you live with other people. Some women are still cool with waking up with their families for suhoor and then sneaking little bites of things throughout the day. But if you’d rather sleep in, that’s ok too! You do whatever works best for you. But also make sure you’re getting enough nutrients because your body definitely needs it during this time.

Live footage of me getting caught sneaking food.

How do you spend this time during Ramadan? Tell me all about it in the comments below!

Assalaamu alaikum!

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